Next week, America will know who the new president is. The fire of anxiety that’s smoldered in the pits of your stomachs for 18 months will flare up into an inferno on Tuesday night and then, just like that, be stamped out by the cold reality of the results. At that sobering moment, you’ll regain your senses. The curse of the news cycle will be lifted and you’ll be free to, you know, focus on your hobbies. To say hello to your neighbors. To take note of the crisp fall air. Sure, half of you will be disappointed, but you’ll still look out at your neighborhood and think, “You know what? Our republic is strong no matter what. It’s a new day.”
But not now. Not yet.
Now is the worst possible time. Now you’re in the fluorescent waiting room as the doctor runs your lab tests. There’s really not much more you can do—except vote next week, if you haven’t already. You’ve read all the magazines and tweeted all the tweets. You deserve a break. And let’s be honest, no matter who you’re rooting for, your blood pressure would benefit from you taking the weekend off from worrying. So stop checking the polls. Stop biting your nails. Gather your popcorn and your comfy blanket—all the things that make you feel safe—and binge watch these perfectly diverting films that will transport you to a happy place where Election 2016 does not exist.